


Where have you been?

by Bosh__tet



Series: The adventures of junior deputy Nathan and Sharky [2]
Category: Far Cry (Video Games), Far Cry: New Dawn
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-15
Updated: 2019-10-15
Packaged: 2020-12-16 22:49:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21044078
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bosh__tet/pseuds/Bosh__tet
Summary: The Judge is the Deputy. The Deputy is the Judge.Now he's here with the Captain of Security, and his friends have a hard time coping. Especially Sharky.





	1. Chapter 1

Hurk and Nick sat, silently perched behind a rock, watching the Judge. They had found reprieve from the usual day to day work to solve what could be considered the biggest mystery of all.

Who was the Judge, really?

All any of them knew was that they had been one of Joseph's guards for a while. Ever since they left the bunkers to be exact. Occasionally, they would see them skulking out in the woods. Usually when they were hunting, and they typically assumed that's what they were doing as well. But any attempt to make contact was futile, as whoever it was would take off before they could get close.

The masked figure crouched down along the side of the river, putting their hand in to let the cool water run between their fingers. They were completely oblivious to their two extra shadow, Nick staring into their back through the binoculars around his neck. Hurk nudged him, whispering softly "What are they doing? I can barely see." 

"Nothing yet." He replied in hushed tones "Just…. Playing in the water."

Suddenly the Judge jerked back, making Nick jump and pull Hurk down. They sunk until the tops of their heads barely peek out from over the boulder, keeping the binoculars against his eyes. The pilot could see the Judge look around as if to check for people. Seemingly satisfied they sat the rest of the way on the ground, reaching up to pull of their hood. It revealed a head of short, dark hair, bits and pieces sticking up from the static.

Nick felt his heart thump wildly in his chest, waiting with baited breath as the figure loosened the straps holding the mask in place. When he lifted it off his face and turned to set it aside, Nick felt his heart jump in his chest. His face was like a blast from the past.

It's was the deputy. Nathan.

Hurk noticed him stiffen, reaching to take the binoculars from the pilot's hands "What happen, let me see!" He put the tool to his eyes, sucking in a sharp breath as he focused in on his face "Dep…."

Before they could say anything else, another body joined them, making them jump. Sharky kneeled down between them, looking between his two stunned friends "What's going on guys? You look like you've seen a ghost."

Hurk swallowed, unsure how to proceed "Uh, well."

Nick interrupted "Well…. Kind of. You….. You should look for yourself."

Something in his voice put the arsonist on edge, gingerly taking the binoculars from his friend. He turned his confused gaze from them to the stream. He visibly stiffened when his brain processed what he was looking at, the plastic falling from his hands to the ground with a soft thud "Nathan?" He croaked. In a flash he was on his feet, running down the hill now calling out the Deputy's name loud enough for him to hear.

The Judge's head snapped up, eyes going wide when he saw who was running at him. He wasted no time grabbing his mask and his bow, scrambling to his feet before taking off into the woods. He could hear Sharky still yelling for him past the trees.

Not caring if it soaked into his shoes, Sharky didn't hesitate to run through the spring after him. Or try to at least. Halfway across, his foot caught on a rock. It sent him toppling down face first into the freezing stream. He simply laid there, groaning softly until Hurk made it down the hill. He waded out to him, helping him to his feet. Nick wasn't far behind.

The look on Sharky's face made his cousin's stomach turn. He'd never seen a man look so defeated and confused at the same time "Why did he run from me?" Sharky said, voice barely above a whisper.

Nick looked towards the forest, a heavy feeling settling in his chest "I…. Don't know. None of this makes sense. Why is he with Joseph? Why has he never tried to let us know he was even alive!"

Hurk put an arm around his cousin "I'm not sure about any of that. But we should take you home and get you dried off cuz. We can try and figure this out later."


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A time skip from the last chapter.

Nathan stuck as close behind the security captain as he could, keeping his head down. Being inside Prosperity for the first time had him on edge and his heart was beating so fast and heavy in his chest he could feel his veins pulsating. Anxiety and fear swirled in his gut, and he attempted to look as small as possible, praying silently that no one approached them.

Sharky watched them from the shadows of the explosives lab, arms folded across his chest. Anyone else looking at him wouldn't notice but knowing the man behind the mask and his mannerisms as well as he did, Sharky could practically see the nervousness rolling off him in waves. Why he was so afraid Sharky didn't understand, but it made him feel a strange mixture of sadness and anger. He knew Joseph had something to do with this. It was the only thing that made this -and that day so long ago when they'd first discovered his secret- make any kind of sense.

"Hey cuz." A voice broke him from his thoughts, startling him enough that he jumped. Hurk looked apologetic "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you. What's got you so jumpy?"

Sharky glanced back towards the main part of the house, seeing that Nathan and Kris had disappeared inside. He sighed and shook his head "It's nothing."

-

Kim tried her best to listen to the Captain's run down of her visit to New Eden. Yet she couldn't keep herself from glancing over Kris's shoulder, staring at the masked man that had entered behind her. He had positioned himself in the corner, facing towards the wall and away from everyone else like he was trying to hide. She too knew his true identity and, like Sharky, it bothered her to see him acting so small and frightened. It made her sick.

"Are you alright?" Kris asked, pulling her attention back to their conversation.

"Yes, sorry. With Joseph's people keeping the twins distracted hopefully we can get a bit of a breather." She spared another glance at her old friend "By the way, Rush wanted me to tell you to see him after you talked to me. He has some ideas on how to further upgrade Prosperity."

Kris nodded "Roger that." She turned to her shrouded companion "Why don't you stay here while I go talk to him, I shouldn't be long. Take a little break before we set back out." And with that she flounced out, leaving Kim and the Judge alone.

Nathan didn't think his heart could go any faster until Kris was walking out the door, leaving him behind. He stiffened when Kim softly said his name, taking a step forward. He turned his face away more, like he was trying to phase through the wall.

Kim paused. She sensed his fear and it stabbed her heart like a knife. This wasn't like him. Nathan was so…. Boisterous before. Always talking and smiling and giving them hope they'd see freedom from Joseph's grasp. Now he was like a frightened child, cowering in a corner from the woman who had made him her daughter's godfather. "What did he do to you?" She asked aloud before she even realized it.

'Nothing.' He wanted to say 'He didn't do anything. It was all me. This is all my fault.' He wanted to tell her, beg her for forgiveness. But instead he cowered, unable to speak, positive he couldn't no matter how much he wanted to. Instead he felt hot tears burn his eyes, fists clenching at his sides. He attempted to will them away but they spilled down his cheeks all the same.

Kim sighed, feeling equal parts sad and frustrated that he didn't answer "Nathan, please. Why won't you talk to me?"

"Kim! We need some help out here!" A distant voice cried out, cutting through the tension like a knife. She looked towards the voice, sighed, and looked back "I have to go take care of that. Can we please talk when I get back?" She asked, sounding hopeful.

Nathan simply grunted, wishing she'd just leave. He could feel her watching for a moment longer before she was finally gone.


	3. Chapter 3

Kris had begun to notice something, having the Judge around. Not only was Kim acting strangely when she first saw the man, but she'd overheard Nick talking to him. He had asked him if he was still the same in there, simply getting grunts in response. 

Then there was the way Sharky watched the masked man's every move whenever they were in the courtyard at the same time.

But the thing that finally clued her in was Hurk. The redneck had come up to him, referring to him as "Dep." And asking how he'd been, giving his own run down of the past few years of his life. The Judge only grunted, which seemed to be his preferred way of communicating. Hurk shifted awkwardly "Oooh, man I'm sorry I'm just…. Real nervous around you."

Kris could see the masked man tense, something that escaped Hurk's notice "Just do me a favor," he continued "If you see me down by the lake partyin', please don't cut me up." He laughed nervously "You know, cause you like…. Got the Jason look going on? Ha. Haha."

They stared at one another in terse silence before Hurk bid him adieu and scurried away. Kris raised her brow at the painful interaction. It was obvious people knew who was truly behind the mask and Kris was determined to find out how.

-

That night she joined them for dinner. Her masked companion as usual, sat in the garden outside, avoiding everyone like the plague. This gave her the perfect chance to ask. She bided her time till it was only Nick, Hurk, and Sharky left at the table. The three men were usually some of the last to eat, which had them right where she needed them "So," she began "I've got some questions for you guys."

Nick looked at her over his aviators, a brow raised "Yeah? What about?"

"The Judge." She could see instant discomfort cross all of their faces at the mention of him "I get the suspicion you knew him previous to all this. What happened? Why is he with Eden's Gate if you guys hate them so much?"

After sharing a glance between the three of them, Nick sighed "Before the bombs fell Eden's Gate was trying to take over Hope county. They kidnapped people, stole our supplies, and brutally murdered anyone that got in the way."

"We thought we were screwed 8 ways to Sunday," Hurk continued "But then some police and a US marshall showed up, trying to arrest Joseph. One of 'em was a young little deputy named Nathan." She saw him glance over at Sharky then. The man had a dark, stormy look on his face as he stared straight down at the table. Something that made Hurk frown "That's who the Judge is. We don't know how or why he's with the Peggies now, but we all got spilt up when the bombs dropped. I can only imagine that that's when it happened."

Kris was quiet for a moment, mulling over the information in her head "Okay. But that doesn't explain why he seems so….. distant. If he thought you were dead why wouldn't he be happy to see you?"

Everyone was startled when Sharky suddenly slammed his fists against the table, standing up so fast his chair went crashing to the floor "Because those motherfuckers turned him against us!" He yelled angrily before storming out of the room. Hurk called out after his cousin, getting up to chase after him.

Nick shook his head, regarding the captain once more "Sharky and Nathan were…. Really close before. This whole thing….. gets him really worked up."

As if to emphasize his point they heard the distinct sound of Sharky's voice in the distance. It was obvious he was yelling at someone and Kris was quick to get to her feet. She rushed outside, Nick right at her heel. They could see him by the flower beds, his hands tightly grasping Nathan by the arms as he shook him. They couldn't make out any exact words but, by the look on Hurk's face as he tried to pry Sharky away, it wasn't good.

Kris marched her way over, able to make out what he was saying as she got closer. Sharky's face was contorted with rage as he demanded a very limp Nathan to speak "Why the fuck won't you talk to me!" He screamed "I spent years thinking you were dead, and then I find out you were with the fucking Peggies the whole time."

"Sharky, man, please. Calm down." Hurk pleaded, tugging weakly at his arm "Yellin' at him ain't gonna fix anything."

It was as if he wasn't there. Sharky just continued his rage until Nick and Kris reached them, helping Hurk pull him off. "Sharky, shut your mouth. You're gonna scare the kids!" Nick hissed.

Sharky wrenched himself free with a disgruntled grunt, cursing under his breath as he stormed into the explosive lab. He slammed the door as hard as he could muster, the wooden frame and the windows rattling violently from the impact.

Hurk sighed when a baby's cry followed shortly after "That woke Blade up, I gotta go check on them."


	4. Chapter 4

Hurk didn't immediately see Sharky when he walked into the lab. He made his way across the wide room, past the tables covered in various reagents and parts, to the stairs at the other side. He quietly made his way up, not hearing his son crying anymore. When he reached the top he could see Sharky. His cousin's frame was illuminated by the moonlight streaming through the window. Blade was in his arms, and Sharky was simply staring at him, a blank look on his face. He didn't look up even when Hurk spoke. "Sharky, man, what the hell was that about?" 

Sharky didn't answer him and the hick felt even more annoyed, figuring he was just flat out ignoring him until finally his cousin answered. He never looked up from the baby in his arms. "This shit is fucking with my head Hurk. One minute I'm mad as hell ready to go kick the fuck outta Joseph and the next I just wanna cry. It ain’t right seeing him like that."

Hurk crossed his arms over his chest. "So yellin in his face is how you think you're gonna fix it?"

Sharky grimaced, shoulders slumping. "No…" he gingerly laid Blade back in his crib. He didn't move away once the baby was settled again, just leaned against the slatted side "I don't know what I was thinkin'. I just made it worse didn't I?"

"Yeah you probably fucking did. You need to go back down there an apologize."

That was when Sharky looked up. "I-"

Hurk pointed at the stairs behind him. "Nu-uh, Charlemagne. You better get your ass back down there right now and tell that boy you're sorry."

Sharky closed his eyes and sighed. He knew Hurk was serious when he called him by his full name. "Okay, you're right. I'll go." He pushed himself away from the crib, skulking past his cousin and carefully making his way down the stairs.

Nick and Kris were still by the garden when he emerged from the explosives lab. They looked over when they heard the door thump as it closed. Nick looked furious still and Sharky had never felt so small in life than he did right now with the pilot staring him down. "You got some real nerve you know that?"

He didn't respond. He simply asked where Nathan had gone. The deputy was nowhere to be found, something that didn't surprise him. He just hoped he hadn't run back to New Eden "I…. Gotta tell him I'm sorry."

Kris, whose expression was softer, pointed over by the helipad "He went that way."

Sharky nodded and took off in that direction. He didn't find him right at the landing zone, but rather to the side, behind the medical building. He was sitting against the wall, legs pulled up tightly against his chest. He was slowly rocking himself back and forth, probably trying to calm down. He didn't make any indication of acknowledging Sharky's presence as he got close. "Hey… "

Nathan froze then, head snapping towards him. Sharky held up his hands as if in surrender "Shhh, hey, no. I'm not gonna yell at ya. I just-" he sighed, eyes falling shut as he lowered his arms "I'm sorry Nathan. I shouldn't have done that to you." He didn't get a response, something he expected "I'm just…. Having a real hard time with this, you know. I…. Really miss you."

Nathan looked back down, picking at the fabric against his knee. 'It's okay.' He thought 'I deserve it. You should be mad at me.' He felt tears well up again, but he fought them off. Sharky stared at him for a moment longer before he sighed, turning and walking away. 

That was when he let it go. 

He sobbed softly, his voice hiccuping in his chest. Nathan felt like he'd been gutted. He wanted to talk to him. He wanted to rip the mask off his face and smother him with kisses. Cup his face and feel his beard scratch against his palms. But he couldn't. This was his punishment. He brought the world down around him and they were suffering for it, couldn't they see that. They were better off this way.

He didn't notice when the old woman crouched down in front of him. Nana looked at him through thick glasses, a concerned frown turning down the corners of her mouth "Oh sweetie, are you okay?" She asked softly, reaching out to lay a gentle hand on his shoulder. He jumped at first, but relaxed as she shushed him. "Didn't mean to startle ya." She apologized "But you looked like you could use a friend. I'm not a therapist ya know, but I'm here if ya need me." 

He let out another shuddering sob as Kris came around the corner. She had seen Sharky walking away and wanted to check on the former deputy. Nana and her made eye contact "I think, once this is all over." The old lady said "We find this one some help. The talking kind of help." She looked back, brushing a hand over the top of his hood "He's got some cobwebs in there he needs clearin out."


	5. Chapter 5

Carmina noticed things had been… tense lately. Ever since the captain of security had brought back that masked man from New Eden. Carmina knew it was an old friend of her parents, someone they had named as her godfather, but she wasn't exactly sure why him being in New Eden and being back here was so straining. She would have thought they'd be happy to see one another.

She did know, however, that this probably had something to do with their obvious distaste for Joseph, the compound's leader. Something her parents and their friends from before the bombs never wanted to talk about. Carmina had pressed and pressed, even gotten in trouble for taking food from the God fearing man, but no one ever told her why. Just that something had happened before that had soured their relations. It made trust between them so impossible, her dad threw a fit when Rush had insisted calling on them for help was their only chance of survival.

And then last night happened. She had been sitting in the infirmary with Grace and Selene when she’d heard the yelling. The two still with their sight looked outside to see Sharky towering over Nathan, shouting at him while the former deputy just stood there and took it until her dad and Kris broke it up. Grace sighed when they filled her in on what had occurred “I shoulda known it would come to that.” she had said, but gave no further details. 

Carmina decided to pry. She sat in the chair directly to the left of the one holding the blind woman. “Why? What happened? I’ve been told for years that Eden’s Gate was bad, but never the reason. And now Nathan, that’s his name right?" She continued when Grace nodded "Is here and everyone seems like they don’t know how to act around him. He was your friend right?”

Grace hesitated at first “It’s….. Not easy to talk about, kid. 17 years isn’t enough to heal that kinda pain.” she was quiet as she contemplated her next words. Milky eyes stared into nothing as she went on “Before the bombs, Eden’s Gate was kidnapping people and stealin' supplies. They cut us off from the surrounding counties and everyone was too afraid to send help. Don’t want them coming after you, too.” she scoffed bitterly “Joseph and his brothers lead it along with some girl named Faith. They called her their sister but they weren’t actually related.”

Carmina and Selene shared a glance. She didn't disbelieve the sniper, but it was weird considering that didn't seem like the man she had met all those years ago. He had been so gentle, his voice soft when he offered her some bread. “But I’ve interacted with Joseph, a long time ago. He gave me food and I remember dad getting so mad he’d even talked to me.”

“Like I said, that family terrorized us. The youngest brother, John, stole your father's plane and tried killing your mom when him and Nathan got it back. While she was still pregnant with you." Grace looked angry, but a little sad as she recounted the tale. She leaned forward in her seat, face directed towards the ground as she rested her forearms on her knees "They were awful. But I do think, in some way, Joseph is using this as a second chance. Jerome has some interesting thoughts on that point."

Carmina looked back out the window to see her dad and Kris talking. Just from the way he stood, Carmina could tell Nick was furious "That doesn't explain Nathan and that little fiasco outside."

"That part I don't know. He was one of the officers with the US Marshall the government sent. Peggies crashed their copper and stranded them here." Her voice wavered. She stood up then, feeling her way to the window "That boy fought for us with everything he had only for the bombs to drop the moment they cuffed that skinny bastard. The officers and Joseph took off in a truck and that was last we saw of them."

Finally, after all these years Carmina understood why the survivors were so haunted. But this still left more questions than it answered. What happened to change Nathan from a willful resistance leader to a cowering husk. She remembered the stories her mom and dad had told her about him. From all the stories of Nathan she had heard, he’d been a kind, gentle man who always knew how to make others smile even during hard times. Now they acted like they were afraid of him, and vice versa. It just didn’t make any sense, and Nathan didn’t seem like he was about to tell anyone any time soon.

These thoughts swirled in her head as she made her way to bed that night and until she finally fell asleep. When she woke up the next morning she went about her day as usual, but promised herself she was going to keep an eye out for the deputy. He was nowhere to be found for the better part of the morning. It wasn’t until a little after lunch time that she finally found him in the garden again. He was watching Sharky, who was outside tinkering with something when Bean, their cartographer, approached him. Carmina didn’t hear their conversation till she approached.

“Oh man,” Sharky grinned “You came to the right guy! I’ve been practicing this.” he then launched into an explanation on orgasms, a topic Bean asked about frequently. She shook her head, but she also noticed Nathan’s shoulders heaving a little, like he was laughing.

She gently laid a hand on his shoulder, giving him a smile when he jumped and turned towards her “Sorry, I tried not to scare you. You’re Nathan, right?” He cocked his head to the side for a moment, and she could tell he was trying to figure out who she was “I’m Carmina. Nick and Kim’s daughter. Your….. God daughter.”

Nathan kicked himself. Even after all this time he should have known, she looked so much like Kim it was ridiculous. He didn’t say anything as she took a seat next to him. He noted to himself that he felt more comfortable in her presence, probably because unlike the others she didn’t really know him the way they did. That made things easier. 

Carmina chose her next words very carefully “I…. just wanted to come and say hello. We haven’t really gotten a chance to meet with everything going on. Mom and dad have told me so much about you.” she picked at her nails, hands laying in her lap as she spoke “Mom said you took her and dad to the birthing center when she went into labor. Do you remember that?”

Nathan grunted. He definitely did. Without a doubt, despite the Peggies and being shot at and kidnapped constantly, that was one of the more stressful moments before the bombs. He was so scared they wouldn’t make it in time, especially after taking Nick’s awful detour suggestion. He didn’t have the first clue how to safely deliver a baby and there was no guarantee the doctors could have found the truck in time. He also remembered Nick calling him in afterwards, letting him hold her tiny swaddled body. He was amazed but nervous, especially when Kim had told him she wanted him to be her godfather. He had promised to always protect her, something he knew he’d failed to do. The thought made him tear up.

Carmina remained blissfully aware of his internal torment. She sounded ecstatic as she continued “I’ve waited almost 18 years to say thank you. That was a wonderful thing you did for them. I just know dad would have been too much of a wreck to drive her himself.” 

His laugh caught them both off guard. She was totally right. Nick was yelling and hollering more than the lady giving birth. Kim had to tell HIM to calm down. Which only made it worse. ‘Maybe Nick should be the mom with the way he stresses’ Nathan had told himself. He felt a pang in his chest. He missed them so much, but no matter how hard he tried he just couldn’t push himself to talk to them. It killed him because he knew they missed him, but he just…… didn’t want to hurt them again.

Carmina just felt sad. She wished she could ask him what happened, but she knew if she did he wouldn't answer anyway. Instead she reached over, taking his hand. He looked over at her "You may be New Eden's Judge," she said, her voice soft "But I know there's some of that deputy I've heard so much about still in there." 

Nathan felt her words knock the wind from him. He wanted to argue, but he bit his tongue. She didn't know. He couldn't blame her for being so optimistic. 'But was I ever really the deputy they thought I was.' Was all he could think to himself.

Carmina chewed the inside of her cheek now. She had hoped that would have elicited some type of reaction, but nothing came. She decided to leave him with one last parting sentiment. "I know you're not just here because Joseph sent you. These are your friends and want you to help them." Her hand came up to rest against his mask, a soft, reassuring smile on her face "And I appreciate that. I know they do, too."

Nathan was trembling when she stood, letting go of his hand. He felt gutted when she added "We love you." Before going to leave. He went to reach for her, to pull her back and tell her, confess his sins so she knew. But he stopped himself, letting his hands fall back to his lap as she disappeared from sight.


End file.
